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Celebrating Andy’s 74th birthday over a fabulous Korean feast.

“The Mirror of Friendship”

A friend holds the mirror of self-esteem.

You can see at a glance someone you admire.

But the beauty of that reflection, to me, it seems,

is the glow of concern from the friendship fire.

……..Dennis Adams (Summer, 1977)

About the poem

When I was about 27 years old (1977), I was at the Defense Language Institute (DLI) studying basic Korean, in Monterey, California. It was an intensive, one-year long course.

During that time one of my Korean instructors introduced me to her niece and asked if I would sing with her for some cultural event they held at DLI for each new class that came through. We studied the culture, customs and arts, as well as the language.

Her name was Cho, Gun Hui but Americans have a hard time remembering Gun-Hui so she adopted the name of Connie (it was the closest-sounding American name to Gun Hui) which she thought would be easier to remember.

I already had lived in Korea for one year and I liked Korean music and had learned several Korean songs, so I was happy she asked me to sing with her niece.

She was a beautiful Korean girl. She sang really well (much better than I) and we became friends. We practiced the songs that we were going to perform for the cultural event, and in so doing, got to know each other fairly well.

I was inspired to write a short poem (the one above) about friendship and I gave a copy to her.

She liked the poem. So she went to a frame shop to have them etch the poem onto a mirror and frame it, and then she gave it to me as a going away gift (I was almost finished with the one-year Korean language program by then).

I was moved by the thoughtfulness of her gift and her friendship.

But, after that summer, we were destined to go our separate ways, and we never did have contact again. But I have good memories of her and the short time I spent with her.

I told my son, Tim, about the poem, and the story behind it…………

No! Wait a minute…..

I told my son, Tim, about the poem, and the story behind it…….

No! Sorry! Just one more minute.

I told my son, Tim, about the poem, and the story behind it…….

Oh my gosh! Sorry!………..

I told my son, Tim, about the poem, and the story behind it……..

TIM:

“Hmm…The Mirror of Friendship“, he murmured, while contemplating the story.

Then he continued, “Dad, that’s such a clever way of saying the only friend you have is yourself!” 😂😂

ME:

I don’t know why I even try…..😳😩

Anyway……

My favorite line in that poem is “…the glow of concern from the friendship fire.“

When you are really good friends with someone there is always a genuine caring and concern emanating from both sides.

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